After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of ... unmet needs she had endured . Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, he embraced and kissed her long and passionately as her husband watched - with a raised eyebrow . The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze. The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this? " "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish.
The presidents of all the beer companies got together for a social evening. The president of Budweiser ordered a Bud, the president of Miller a Genuine Draft. The guy from Coors ordered a Coors Lite and the guy from Labatt's a blue. After everyone else had ordered, the president of Shiner Bock ordered a coke. The others all laughed at him and asked him why he didn't order a Black Lager. He looked at them and said "I just figured if you weren't going to drink beer, neither would I."
