So a thread this past week, really got me thinking about race relations and such. I was at the gym this morning and saw six men having a conversation after playing racketball. They seemed to be lifelong friends and I found myself being a bit jealous of the freedom in which they shared ideas. One was a black man and the others were white. I found myself wondering as they were talking later if the lone black man thought about being a black man or truly didn't think about it at all while he was with his friends. Did he have to qualify his statements as they talked or was he completely free to be himself. I also wondered about the perception of him by the white men he was with. I know I am taking a chance in writing this for fear I may have revealed some flaw in my own character by even bringing it up. Is it an okay subject to even address? Or has it been tiptoed around for way too long? If I offend any in bringing it up... please forgive me. It is certainly not my intention to cause friction. I am just wondering what wisdom some may share.
I grew up in an area that was pretty much all white. Pretty much meaning 99.99%. I really didn't know much about race when I was growing up. Since then I have learned..... There are: Good white people ****ty white people Good black people ****ty black people Good Hispanics ****ty Hispanics Good Native Americans ****ty Native Americans Good (insert any demographic) ****ty (insert any demographic) Once anyone realizes their **** actually does stink too, they'll realize the same thing.
How many ****ty Japanese/American Indian/mutt mixes have you met? .... 'cause I'm awesome. bwahahahaahahha!!!
Being a "white guy from the hood", and if these men are anything at all like my group of friends, I assure you the black guy felt no pressure to try to fit in -if this group was in fact a group of life-long buddies. Nor do the white guys of this group look at him differently than they do each other. This has been my experience anyway.
I hope you are right. I am in Alabama... Such a mixture of friends is not something I witness everyday here, at least not from adults.
Yeah I grew up just outside of philly and grew up around a complete mix of races. I don't think where I grew up there was much of that. We all Hung out and played sports and never looked at race. Sure it comes up as we joke on eachother and all but really I feel all races get along great if you put race aside. Were all human and as long as we remember that we all get along well.
I grew up in midwestern towns made up of Americans of european descent. My father was one of the biggest bigots that ever walked the face of the earth and my mom was one of the most non biased people I've ever met. Kind of felt like I was growing up in Archie Bunker's place. The first minorities I ever met were at the reception station at Great Lakes Naval Training Center. It was also the first time I ever experienced discrimination. While I tried to get along with everyone since we were all serving the same nation in the same branch of service, others in my company had grown up in different circumstances and had preconceived stereotypes of people of the same race as myself. I persisted in getting along and by the time the thirteen weeks of Naval Basic Training was done, we all looked at each other as sailors and Americans. It was the same in the army and in the Air Force for the most part. Every human being, including those of the same race to include identical twins, have differences. We should not look at someone's skin color to make our opinions of that person because race doesn't mean crap. And even though we are all different, we all depend on air, water, and nutrition for life and all bleed red blood. When I get together with friends all I see are friends.
I think you just saw some friends in the gym. Friends don't go by color. They go by who is suppose to buy, whose turn to step up or whatever. Your character flaws are..... well.. really... you see there is a problem. Too many people in this world are trying to make you have a problem with friends in the gym having fun. Get over it. Have some fun with your friends. P.S. Are you black or white... oh, maybe yellow....enjoy your friends. They come in many flavors.
Oh, I have friends of many nationalities. I am a large percentage American Indian and like it when people ask about my heritage. I took a college class once on this subject years ago and one of the points made was it can be offensive to say you don't recognize someone's ethnicity. I didn't understand that at the time and am still not sure I do completely but to do so can deny where someone comes from, to deny the societal struggles they have had to overcome, or deny something about their heritage that they may be very proud of. It is certainly racist when their ethnicity becomes a barrier to friendship but to not recognize it, is in a sense, insensitively communicating to them that they aren't free to be themselves. For the record, I have people who say some pretty hateful things about me because I do have friends, good friends, who are Chinese, Thai, Korean, Hispanic, Black, Russian, Italian, Scottish, Irish, Indian and others. Though it wasn't my original question, we also have friends that are a homosexual couple raising an adopted daughter that we adore, and when we go to swim meets, they choose to hang out with us, the Southern Baptist preacher and his family. I don't find myself thinking about their orientation or judging them and they don't have to hide discussions from us about their life together. We do continue to exercise our faith openly around all our friends and most of them join us when we pray before meals or before swims. Of course it isn't a prerequisite to being loved by us but I sure do appreciate the freedom to be a weird, part Cherokee, part Choctaw, part White, Southern Baptist Preacher from Alabama with friends who accept me... just as I am.
well there are always going to be people with different thoughts then myself and my circle of friends. In many areas race is still an issue. Also media and politics as stated above make it an issue. Like the killing in Florida for example. The media couldn't make it out that one man killed another and its under investigation weather or not it was self defence or murder. they had to say a white man shot a black man and bring the race into it. It helped them a ton cuz it stirred everyone up and sold them tons of stories. They don't know if race has anything to do with it, other then the color if the 2 men's skin. I feel that if the media and certain groups left race out of it and left it as 2 Americans involved it wouldn't have caused any issues or hard feelings. but I could be very wrong as well, just my opinion from my past.
I can comment on this because I am black and all of my frineds are white. One of my best friends growing up said I was the "Whitest Black Guy he has ever met." Because I hunt, fish, play golf, I am Republican, I drive a pickup and I am an Engineer. He said I don't do things that he and other black people do. I have heard it all my life and I pay it no attention. When I travel and go places for work, be it a Training Class or Seminar, 99.9% of the time I am the only black person there and I never feel out of place. The people I hangout with have the same interests that I have. That is why we are friends. When I meet a deer hunter, golfer, bass fisherman or fellow Republican, I don't see color, I see person that have something in common with me. Yeah I have been places where people noticed I was the only black guy, but they had a problem not me. If I was not comfortable being with them, I would have stayed my @ss at home. They are my friends because of who I am as is why I am their friend. Last Friday, 8/5, I was at the Archery Shop and the Owner asked to see a pic of the big buck I am after. I showed him on my phone and two other white guys there, who had a rebel flag on there hat, asked me could they see. They then showed me some bucks they were after. They both shook my hand and introduced themselves. That is why I love deer hunters. We ALL love the chase of a Big Buck and when we meet, we don't see color, we see another hunter with the same passion we have. Yes, I am sure there are some out there that have their issues, but I don't see it. Deer Hunters are a Rare Breed and Great Men in my book. Great Post. We need to discuss things like this.
Very well said and my point exactly buddy! My only hope is that one day its not just deer hunters that see eachother as deer hunters and not black and white, but that Americans get fully to that point as well! As I said in my response that's how its always been where i grew up and i can only hope that the rest of the country is that way or gets that way because people that see color are missing out on alot of great friends and will never know how much we all truly have in common.
I agree with SharpEyeSam about having things in common you don't see race. I have neighbors live in decent subdivision near St Louis the home prices are between $230 to $375. There is a great mix of people living here and we all drink the same beer. Lol! My neighbors that just moved in last year are a mixed couple he’s black and she’s white. He is basket ball coach at SIUE and is a supper great guy. I couldn’t ask for a better neighbor, because I love no other sport like College Basketball. I love it so much that I never had any neighbor to talk to about it. Now he and I get into hour long discussion about that wonderful sport. He doesn’t drink beer, but loves Vodka, and that works out well because my wife works for Missouri’s largest liquor distributer. We both have 2 year old boys who also play together. I couldn’t ask for a better neighbor. My other neighbor is a bowhunter and we too get along. Now if I just had a neighbor who had hundreds of acres that I could hunt all by myself I would be in heaven. lol I've been surrounded by all sides my entire life. My Grandpa Self was half American Indian and Irish and he absolutely hated everyone. In his final days he was at Springfield, MO hospital suffering Heart failure and he still couldn't let it go. He would call his nurses racist names and it hurt me to even here it. I loved him regardless but it was painful to be around. Later on in life I’ve come to understand that he grew up dirt poor and was picked on by all races. My great Grandma was knocked up by a married man and was just given some cash to hush up. She was kicked out of the reservation by her native family. She raised my grandpa in a ghetto and married a fisher man. Being different around blacks and whites in that time was bad all together, because he had no one to relate too. He was beat up, picked on, and not accepted by any race. That brought on the hate. My father and uncles have all said that growing up in their house hold wasn’t easy, but most of them got out and made something with their lives. It’s sad but luckily not that common anymore as more and more race’s are mixed together.
Thank you for your candor...it is very refreshing. Do you think you are the norm or an exception? Or does, as was shared, the media highlight the few exceptions while ignoring that the vast majority of us interact... or at least want to interact with each other as you described? I do see the animosity here in Alabama a lot... and I hate it... and I teach my son differently but I'll admit... there are times when it is hard to ignore. We insist that he go to public school because of the high level of segregation in the private schools and the majority of the friends he invites to our home are from other cultures. We would have it no other way... We love it.
