Alright, this may be very random (and a little nasty)...After discussing this issue as a mere joke, I thought it would actually be interesting to see what comes up. We've all heard the stories of guys that couldn't hold it and just had to pee from their stand. So let's find out who has taken it to the next level and done the almighty #2. Also, feel free to tell us how you think it really effects deer hunting. I'll be the first to admit it. Sorry.
Dig A hole away from the tree stand somewhere down wind and always carry TP.... Also never forget to take your bow with u
my first deer kill happened the day i literally couldnt get any further away from my stand than right at the base of the tree my stand was in. just got a sick feeling before first light, so i climbed down QUICKLY and did my business, climbed back up, and 10 minutes later he walked out. it was only a button buck (thought it was a doe) but it was my first kill. he walked within 10 yards of my restroom/ treestand
I've never had to do it from the stand, but I've definitely dropped a hot molly brown close by. For extra points, **** wherever you damn well please and use biodegradable paper so the wind can pick it up when you're down. Animals crap in the woods all the time, you might as well be one of them.
I have had to several times in the woods but there has had only been 2 times when I couldnt even make it out of the tree. I just hung off and let it fly. And I know it sounds crazy, but believe it or not, I killed a buck within 20 minutes after both times. 2 years ago in indiana, i had just got my pants back up when a hot doe brought an 8 point 30 yards from the tree. Last year on the last weekend of the season, I shot a 6pt at 15 yards about 20 minutes after I had did my business. Kind of a good luck charm for me. My buddies tell me I need to start gorging on chili and baked beans the night before a hunt. Kinda crazy the way that has worked out.
My story actually occurred back in '94 and during the opening day of the IL gun season. I had joined my girlfriend on a college trip to the Hispanic Museum in Chicago and then a Peruvian resturant for dinner the night before the opener. Great food! The next morning I had just gotten in the tree when I got nauseous and prepared to throw up. Well, that subsided without vomitting, but then an atomic bomb exploded in my gut. Being positioned in a very small homemade wood treestand I decided it was time to get my arse on the ground for a possible bowel movement. By the way...it was still too dark to see more than 20 yards, but light was quickly coming. As I down I realize that it was time to find a way to unload this beast so I climbed down and got out of my coveralls, then dropped my jeans, then my long-johns and finally my undies. An explosion like I had never experienced in my brief 20 years quickly followed. Unbelievable relief had instantly occurred! I then realized I had nothing to wipe with....except dry, crumbling leaves. At the first wipe noise erupted to my left....2 does took off that must have come in and bedded (noise I had heard prior to my nausea). I then realized my AM hunt was over before it even started and was upset. Next, I reached down to pull up my layers of clothing and noticed the explosion that occurred on a few short minutes prior "sprayed" my long johns. I then removed my boots, my coverall and my jeans to get to my long johns. Good news...I had something to more fully complete my wiping! I replaced all of my previously removed clothing and grabbed my borrowed 12 gauge to head home slowly as I could feel another round starting to build. Crap...there was another hunter, who I did not know, facing me from a tree 100 yards behind my tree. He waved to me while I left the woods as quickly as I could. He got the luxury of looking at my tarnished long johns all morning. hehehehe
Last yr gun hunting I could not hold it. So I climbed out of my stand and did my business and realized i had no toilet paper so I had to use a ratchet strap cord to my stand lol.
When nature calls. I was Lucky in the past and had no issues in the field but lately it seems like as soon as I get up in the stand, it's starts a knocking. Then I have to debate with myself whether oldest an hold it for three plus hours or just get down and get it over with. Usually it's the latter. Glad to hear I'm not alone though and I still may have a shot at some deer.
About five years ago I was hunting this spot where I parked my truck in a small sandy area out in the woods. One evening my hunt was cut short because of the call. I made it back to the truck but could go no further. I dug a hole in the sand and did the deed but all I had to clean myself was my boxer briefs. When I was done I buried the whole thing undies and all. The next day when I got to my parking spot I noticed the coyotes dug everything up and dragged my underwear about 20 feet from the hole. :0)~
I dont know what it is about turkey hunting and the rumbling in the stomach but its happens to me every friggin year! I learned from my first season that leaves dont feel so good walkin back to the truck so TP is always on my list to pack in the vest. Never happens to me in the deer woods though.
I usually get down and walk off about 30-40 yards or so, find a tree and do my business. Never seen a deer while going but have killed many deer after a bathroom break. It never seemed to bother the deer in the least. Many years ago during the gun season, my father-in-law had to go so he got down from his stand and went off only a few yards. He was actually pulling up his pants when the biggest deer he ever killed, a big 8-point walked directly across in front of him at about 15 yards. He let go of his pants, picked up his slug gun and pulled the trigger....pants around his ankles! He said it was his easiest kill he'd ever had!
I really hate to admit this but we're all coming out, right? About twenty years ago, I was in the woods in the early AM when "the call" came. There was a small swamp with little trees all around it, right next to my stand. I'm thinking if I Just get ahold of one of those trees and just kinda lean out over the water, it will cut down on scent. So that's what I started to do. I had just kinda leaned back and put my weight on the tree when I heard a loud "SNAP." The next thing I knew I was picking myself up out of that cold swamp. Moral of the story; never put your weight against a tree that is sometimes under water. And the second lesson learned? Never tell your brother-in-law those kind of stories. He razzes me to this day about it. Blessings.......Pastorjim
Opening day my buddy and I make the trek into the woods, he in one direction and me in the other (about 300 yards apart). About an hour later I thought I heard him shoot his bow and an hour after that he comes by with a big friggin grin! He brings me over to see his tall Spike still in velvet AFTER he shows me where he crapped 1/2 before the buck stepped out - what are friends for Now every Sept14th (day before Archery opened) I leave him a little voicemail and sing to him like Tammy Wynette, instead of "Stand by your Man" it is switched up with Chit by your Stand...
Never from stand,,crick beds work good for conceilment and in case of emergency wash up :p Real men use there camo gloves for paper, hang em in a tree and retrieve after no less than 4 down pours
You really need to tell that story again, Bro ...hilarious! For me, I just use carbon toilet paper .... the experts say it works!
Pro Tip: Take a dose of soluble fiber (Metamucil will work or some generic psyllium fiber capsules) the night before you plan to hunt and it will decrease the urgency of you having to drop a load. Not only does soluble fiber slow down the time it takes stuff to move to your colon, but it also decreases the effect movement in your gut has. As a bonus, you'll have one of the most comfortable ****s of your life when it finally works its way through.
I am terrified of heights… To the point that my tree stand is only 10 feet off the ground…. I get nervous when I stand up to draw my bow lol… There is no way I would be able to hang off the side to do my business… If I have to take the browns to the Super bowl I am getting out of my stand for sure!!
