Just this past Saturday a fellow blogger and Sonoma Belly Boat Club member Chris Youlden took his life. Learning of Chris passing since no more than 2 weeks ago he mailed out and delivered Club T-shirts with a note saying looking forward to the upcoming season was a shock. He was always a great sense of laughter and helpfulness. And man he could fish all day if you let him. What caused him take his life? No one is certain but he was deeply frustrated about not able to find a job for the past 2 years. "His last facebook post he was complaining about finding a job and sounded fed up"! Several companies he did find employment with went under this could have caused hidden depression. No one can be certain of his reasons, but his actions has left many questions. I will just say no matter of our daily struggles, highs and lows. Suicide is not the answer to any problem. Many people have thought of this as an answer to me it's a cowardly way out and only leave more wounds than solve any problem. I look at my life as I do others and remember one thought. God would not put no more pressure on us than he know we can handle. I wish Chris could have reached out for more help. I wish that no matter what stage of life any of us are in that we'll never feel backed up in a corner with no out. That we'll Find a way to make it work, suicide just isn't an option nor answer. People that choose that path just never exhausted all other avenues for help. Never fear failure, never fear trying, never fear giving up. Never fear life, live.
That is absolutely terrible. My prayers go out to his family and friends. So sad that even today with all the resources for help available people still come to this type of conclusion.
I'll be praying for his family and friends. However, and please excuse me if this seems out of order, i'm not sure sharing the details of what made him take his own life and how you think it is a coward's way out is going to help the situation. If it was a friend or family member of mine I would not exactly be thrilled if someone posted about it on a forum. I prefer to keep things of this magnitude a private matter and I'm a little confused as to why you posted something like this. I may be 100% wrong and the family is OK with it and sees this as beneficial. Nothing personal against you either, this is just my honest opinion.
Code: God would not put no more pressure on us than he know we can handle. Obviously not the case here.
When I was in the Navy, my LPO "Leading Petty Officer" committed suicide and through out my Naval career you hear and see people attempt it or succeed in doing so. I've always asked that question why? By talking about the act it challenges those that consider suicide to find another way to resolving a problem. This very subject was brought up on that blog only weeks ago and I made the same point. "Suicide is a cowards way out". Chris didn't bring it up someone else did. I respect the man, I loved many of his ideals, he was the first person to invite me out to California to fish with them and he was always the first person to never wanted to give up trying. For all things that have transpired in my life a friend said to me he was surprised that I haven't considered it. Because he had on several occasions. A real friend would know that's never a consideration to me. I love life and for all the BS we all go through ending my life or suggest someone to end theirs has never entered my mind once. And I hope that if it enters anyone mind here on this blog that they seek help. Suicide only put the family through hell, children that see this sometimes follow the footstep of suicide. My thought may be inappropriate and insensitive to you. But leaving a family emotionally devastated through this act is nothing more than murdering a families hope. Never give up. There are no redoes when a person close the door of opportunity permanently. I hope that clear that up. The sun is shining. Let's go see what God has presented us with today.
I don't think we can call someone a coward until we walk in their shoes. I used to share this same opinion until I had a friend confide in me that he almost committed suicide about a year ago. He told me that no one can begin to understand the mental state of someone suicidal until they have experienced it for themselves, it is a slow downward spiral of depression until one day they think that no one will miss them or the world around them would be a better place without them. They convince themselves that they are doing it for the benefit of others and ironically they think the opposite of a cowards way out, they think they the only thing that will eventually make life better for their loved ones. Sure this doesn't apply to every suicidal case, but I walked away from that with a whole new perspective of what that type of mental state does to a guy.
I feel your pain. Many unanswered ? . I lost my oldest son may 11 2011, i think alot of it was pdsd (post dramatic stress disorder) he spent 22 months south of heaven, came back with many medels and honors including going above and beond the call of duty. RIP SGT.Solots ps.it was the wifes b-day
You make a great point. Suicide has nothing to do with being a coward and everything to do with mental illness. I'm sure most of us in here know someone that has committed suicide and to be honest why would a coward kill themselves? Wouldn't a coward be afraid to make one last commitment to themselves by ending their life? Death in itself is one of the scariest things we will all face so how would a coward get up the courage to die? The people I know that have ended their lives all had one thing in common, a family history of suicide or depression. In my family we have nobody that has ever taken their lives, maybe because we are cowards and afraid to die Something drove this guy into a depression that left him feeling no worth, most likely in his eyes he had no value and was a burden. Don't let an act like this change your opinion of a great guy. Look at what happened and determine if there were signs you missed. Chances are you will have someone else in your life that is thinking the same way he is and the lessons learned from him could prevent another from joining him.
I have lost to many freinds to this , i also lost my son! It will never get better to deal with you just go day by day