Planning a wedding...and dealing with In-laws

So I am curious...Normally I spend all my free time in the woods during the off season preparing for the upcomming year, but this year I have planning a wedding. The planning is going fantastic, however dealing with my soon to be in-laws is driving me nuts!

I am curious if anyone else out there has any horror stories regarding the planning process or just having to deal with difficult people during the wedding process. If we want something to be blue, they want it be red. If we want vanilla cake they want chocolate. It would be nice to know we aren't the only ones that have had to deal with crazies during a process like this.

Of course I am sugar coating this a ton but I could write a miniature novel about all the crap that my fiance and I have had to deal with.

God bless being able to go out in the woods and fish every once in awhile to keep me sane.

Ok I will get off my soap box.

 

We paid for our own wedding, so we didn't have to put up with anything

 

If you are going through this now I would say that it probably isn't going to change after the wedding.

 

I would say Dan is most suited to discuss this.

 

You need to let them know that this is you and your future wife's wedding. Not theirs. You appreciate their input, but in the end, the final decisions are you and your future wife's to make.

My MIL made my Mom cry on our wedding day, so yeah, I have some inlaw horror stories.

 

Yeah you're right Fitz. When you aren't paying for it all it can definitely cause some problems. I will be thankful when the wedding is done and we go to our honeymoon. The best part is we get back on sept 30 so I can be in a tree on October 1st.

 

Hooker your MIL made her cry? :-/. What the heck happened?

 

I cried too, when I heard about that poor girl marrying Hooker.

 

If they are paying.....you just have to suck it up and deal with it.

 

If they're paying you could always take that part out of the equation and do what you want. My in laws tried to pay for things to control it and we paid for it all so we wouldn't be their puppets. Granted their plan, admitted in court, was to keep us from marrying and get what they could, so our problems were way beyond just the wedding. Sometimes conflicts show more of the big picture. Hopefully yours is just the wedding arguments. Good luck either way

 

My in laws were pretty cool about everything. They did pay for it too. I have a screw it attitude though, if they wanted something their way they could have a second wedding. I mostly stayed out of the wedding planning though. My wife asked my opinion a couple of times and I gave some absurd answer ( she asked what we should do for place holders and I suggested little stuffed squirrels. After that when my opinion got asked and I said I didn't care she left well enough alone. Her dads only request was that it wasn't during hunting season

 

If your future father in law pisses you off to bad just look him in the eye and say......Im doing your daughter.

 

My mom was our wedding designer (she is an interior designer) and she knew the style that me and my wife wanted. The MIL has the taste most of the men on this board (read: horrible). She kept talking about how she didn't understand the style and making fun or sarcastic comments about the design in front of my Mom. Our wedding was featured in 2 local magazines, 1 national magazine, and one of the internet most popular wedding blogs, so my Mom obviously did something right.

The MIL also pretty much complained about everything. From the food, to the heat (it was outside in the fall), to having to walk 100 yards to the reception, etc. They didn't pay a dime towards our wedding.

 

My MIL actually attempted to set our wedding date for us, it went downhill from there.


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My FIL did not even come, he told me he's not coming and I agreed

Past that it went great, remember you are not only marring her, you are marring her entire family.

 

I guess I was just lucky. My in-laws (who are both gone now...God rest their souls) were fantastic. Basically anything we wanted we got. The only problem we had was on the day of the wedding my wife left the wedding liscence at home. The pastor at the church (who was not conducting the ceremony), told us if we did'nt have the liscence...no wedding. The priest who was marrying us and him got into a big arguement. I thought I was gonna witness two priests duking it out. In the end my Dad went and got the liscence. Now after 16 years we sit back and laugh about it.

 

I'm hoping someday we will be able to laugh it off but right now I'm definitely not laughing.

 

Weddings generally bring out the worst in women. Hopefully you can help them understand that this is you and your future wife's wedding, and if not, just ride the storm out and hope it calms after the honeymoon.

 

Best of luck sir.... you gonna need it!

 

During our wedding planning, I told my wife the only decision I want to make on my own is picking out the tuxes - everything else can be decided with her and her wedding crazy mother. It just wasn't worth the hassle for me. The day came when it was time to pick them out so my wife and I went to the store and the lady started showing us tuxes. She showed me about 5 or so that I didn't care for so I asked what else they had. The lady left got her manager (which I thought was weird), manager came and she told me that these were the only ones they could guarantee to have in time for our wedding (6 months away). My wife became agitated and started grilling the manager who finally broke. Get this, apparently my soon to be mother in law had came in earlier and hand picked the ones she liked and instructed the sales girl to show these and only these when I came in.

This is the same woman who bought my daughter a dog for Christmas 5 years ago without asking us. We don't have a good relationship