One vs. Two Kids (or three if you're insane).

Discussion in 'The Water Cooler' started by MGH_PA, May 25, 2017.

  1. MGH_PA

    MGH_PA Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2008
    Posts:
    10,313
    Likes Received:
    124
    Dislikes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Cogan Station, PA
    So my wife and I are starting to talk about a possible kid #2 now that our son is 1.5yrs old. I've never been a huge fan of a second child aside from providing him a sibling to play with and share experiences with (that's not even a given as I had two siblings and I was never really close with them).

    Our son has been a blast. I never thought I would love being a dad as much as this. He's a very happy boy who has always been very easy to raise to this point (slept through the night since 5 weeks old), takes medicine like a champ even if it probably tastes awful, can usually sit in a high chair at a restaurant and not lose his mind, etc. He's basically perfect :) :lol:. I'm sure number 2 would be the complete opposite.

    That being said, I feel like we've adjusted well to life as a group of three. Sure I don't hunt as much, and I can barely find time in the day to mow my own yard or build and tune my new bow, but it's still a great life. It's just different than it was before he came along. It's the new n"normal."

    I feel like adding a second will pretty much turn everything on its head.

    All the crap your read online about this topic either claims you're selfish if you have one, insane if you want more than one.

    Ultimately it's a personal decision to be made between my wife and I, but I'm curious to hear everyone's own personal opinions. How many do you have? Recommendations? Opinions? Curious to hear from the single child parents and those with more than one as well.
     
    NEW61375 likes this.
  2. remmett70

    remmett70 Die Hard Bowhunter

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2015
    Posts:
    2,250
    Likes Received:
    296
    Dislikes Received:
    6
    Location:
    Rothschild, WI
    Three. Twin girls (17) and a single daughter (10)

    As long as you have the time and financial ability to support them. I don't have a reason not to have more.
     
    Last edited: May 25, 2017
    elkguide likes this.
  3. Christine

    Christine Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2008
    Posts:
    6,902
    Likes Received:
    144
    Dislikes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Central Utah, baby!!
    I have lots of neighbors with 3-4 kids. A few with 5. A couple with 7 and one with 9.

    They still hunt, fish and camp. And they stay mostly sane. And they do this without drinking coffee or alcohol.

    As someone who has never had any kids, it just amazes me. :)

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk
     
  4. BJE80

    BJE80 Legendary Woodsman

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2009
    Posts:
    14,260
    Likes Received:
    242
    Dislikes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Central and Northern Wisconsin
    If you and your wife are content with one and things are going well I would not feel ANY pressure to have another. You better make 100% you are all in for the 2nd. I was not all in but we had two anyway and sure I love my 2nd boy one kid would of been enough and I somewhat regret the 2nd. Sounds awful but I'm just being honest. Screw the selfish talk and all that. Do what is right for your life since you only get once chance at it.
     
  5. Rick James

    Rick James Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2008
    Posts:
    4,740
    Likes Received:
    247
    Dislikes Received:
    0
    Location:
    N. Illinois
    I feel like a lot of the social skills kids need as adults develop from having siblings. That was one of the most important things we thought if when making the decision. I'd have been fine with one but I think two just feels right for us, our daughter will be here any day.....
     
  6. Sota

    Sota Legendary Woodsman

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2014
    Posts:
    11,156
    Likes Received:
    1,117
    Dislikes Received:
    15
    Location:
    Minnesota
    I have 2 kids a daughter and a son, neither kid was planned they just happened. Once we had the bases covered of a girl and a boy we were done. I can't imagine just having one kid, or more than two especially once they get of college and marriage age that is when it gets expensive.
     
  7. MnMoose

    MnMoose Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2014
    Posts:
    3,789
    Likes Received:
    100
    Dislikes Received:
    2
    Location:
    West Central MN
    The only life experience I bring into this conversation is that I grew up virtually as an only child. both my siblings were half siblings and moved out before I was born. While I have never struggled in the social realm, there were a lot of growing pains from my late teens up until now associated with being an only child. This became especially noticeable when I started dating. I am not saying that every only child has these, but for me it was apparent that I grew up as an only child by the way I acted with sharing, my mentality on "Its all about me", never being force to think about others, and stuff like that.

    I don't think I was an ******* or anything (most of the time), but often problems came up especially dating when you start getting close to another person. I always wanted to do what I wanted to do and didn't regard what she wanted to do as something as important as my wants. I was just used to only thinking about myself because growing up that's pretty much all I had to think about when it really came down to it. Sure I had friends and I thought about those people but if fertilizer hits the aerator, I could just go home and do what I wanted again.

    Again, I have no kids, but I firmly believe there are a lot of life long lessons that are most easily taught by siblings. I see this all the time with my brothers kids (12 y/o daughter and twin 7 y/o boys). If you have the financial resources, I think you will love your lifestyle just as much or more when #2 comes along. More love, more children to share your hobbies with, more grandchildren to enjoy your retirement with, more happiness. Kids (from what I have been told) are the greatest joy in your life, why not have more of it!?

    Your hunting will for sure go down. You'l have two of everything, two sports practices, two music lessons, two trips to town for XYZ - but you will also have two children to share your hunting with when the time comes. Also, and my brother taught me this so he gets the credit, when your one son and son/daughter grow up (middle school - high school)and beef hits $5-6-7/lb again, your wife will be begging you to shoot more deer and may even suggest an elk hunt when the freezer gets empty. Kids eat a **** ton, I know I was that chunker :) 5,000 calories a day in varsity football to MAINTAIN weight - and I was trying to get bigger ;)

    Your marriage, your family, obviously your decision, but I don't think you would ever regret having another child.

    Just my two cents with very little experience to back it up!
     
    Gator Dale and MGH_PA like this.
  8. BJE80

    BJE80 Legendary Woodsman

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2009
    Posts:
    14,260
    Likes Received:
    242
    Dislikes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Central and Northern Wisconsin
    Wait........ You had sex?
     
  9. Sota

    Sota Legendary Woodsman

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2014
    Posts:
    11,156
    Likes Received:
    1,117
    Dislikes Received:
    15
    Location:
    Minnesota
    Yeah Brad you should try it, perhaps you won't be such a squid.
     
    sheddinva, MnHunterr, Justin and 3 others like this.
  10. BJE80

    BJE80 Legendary Woodsman

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2009
    Posts:
    14,260
    Likes Received:
    242
    Dislikes Received:
    3
    Location:
    Central and Northern Wisconsin

    [​IMG]
     
  11. remmett70

    remmett70 Die Hard Bowhunter

    Joined:
    Jul 13, 2015
    Posts:
    2,250
    Likes Received:
    296
    Dislikes Received:
    6
    Location:
    Rothschild, WI

    Got home from 3 month hunting trip and the wife was 2 months pregnant.
     
    virginiashadow and BJE80 like this.
  12. Hatfield Hunter

    Hatfield Hunter Weekend Warrior

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2016
    Posts:
    206
    Likes Received:
    84
    Dislikes Received:
    6
    Location:
    central wi
    2 cents--- after you are long gone a child with a sibling would still have family !!!
     
  13. wl704

    wl704 Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2012
    Posts:
    3,704
    Likes Received:
    341
    Dislikes Received:
    1
    Location:
    greater-Charlotte NC
    My wife and I have 5 kids. After 2 it's zone defense so the number matters less.

    #2 was a challenge as you realize how much you spoiled the first and all the mistakes you made. With #3 and subsequent you learn the value of routine.

    Which led me to my theory on kids and pancakes...the first one you want so bad but they're quirky, maybe a bit over/under cooked...the more you make the more practice and better results you get...
     
    Shocker99, MGH_PA and Christine like this.
  14. foodplot19

    foodplot19 Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2014
    Posts:
    4,434
    Likes Received:
    460
    Dislikes Received:
    1
    Location:
    West Central Missouri
    We have 2, both boys. If we were younger, we would have more. They are 6&9 now. Priorities have shifted a little but we keep them involved with things around the farm and the things they are interested in. My wife loves the outdoors as much as I do. That helps tremendously.
    It is truly a personal decision.

    Enjoy every minute of it, either way!
     
    Shocker99 and MGH_PA like this.
  15. Fitz

    Fitz Administrator

    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2008
    Posts:
    19,130
    Likes Received:
    330
    Dislikes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Ely, MN
    We have one. I'd consider a second, but my wife doesn't really want another. My brother on the other hand has 6!

    .... never.
     
  16. Christine

    Christine Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2008
    Posts:
    6,902
    Likes Received:
    144
    Dislikes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Central Utah, baby!!
    :D[​IMG][​IMG]

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk
     
    elkguide, Swamp Stalker and Shocker99 like this.
  17. MGH_PA

    MGH_PA Moderator

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2008
    Posts:
    10,313
    Likes Received:
    124
    Dislikes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Cogan Station, PA
    Odd. I would guess it's usually the other way around.
     
  18. wl704

    wl704 Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2012
    Posts:
    3,704
    Likes Received:
    341
    Dislikes Received:
    1
    Location:
    greater-Charlotte NC
    Fitz, I can hook you up...on the upside they're all potty trained...on the downside they'll all be in college this fall... :(

    And my boys eat...A LOT.
     
    foodplot19 likes this.
  19. Sota

    Sota Legendary Woodsman

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2014
    Posts:
    11,156
    Likes Received:
    1,117
    Dislikes Received:
    15
    Location:
    Minnesota
    I will admit I was kind of a 3rd kid I loved to have fun with my kids, I got yelled at many times for throwing a ball or playing catch in the house, did lots of stuff where I said don't tell Mom, had fun. The hardest part about having more kids is going back to that level of having a new born. You have a kid then you need a car seat and a sherpa to go anywhere. Kid grows up and can tell you why they are crying and they don't have bodily functions happening that you have to deal with it gets easier. The more kids you have it is another sleep deprived loop thru the trip.
     
  20. Swamp Stalker

    Swamp Stalker Grizzled Veteran

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2013
    Posts:
    6,318
    Likes Received:
    1,246
    Dislikes Received:
    3
    Location:
    RI
    Sota,

    do you have sex like you hunt? 2 times per year?
     

Share This Page