Most difficult day of my life

Discussion in 'The Water Cooler' started by LittleChief, Sep 21, 2019.

  1. LittleChief

    LittleChief Grizzled Veteran

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    This is a long read.

    I don't even know why I'm posting this on here. I guess I just feel like I need to tell someone before I try to close my eyes and sleep. My wife left before I got home to do Ozark Trail maintenance and I'm sure telling my six dogs won't help.

    It is now 8:00 am on September 21st 2019. I've been up now for 27 1/2 hours.

    My Mother has been suffering from late stage Alzheimers, severe arthritis and the side effects of a mild stroke for quite some time. We finally agreed a month or so ago that she needed to go into a home and we moved her in a little over two weeks ago.

    She hadn't been there long before she contracted pneumonia. She was transported to a local emergency room but given her state the decision was made to take her back to the home under hospice care.

    My sisters who live in the same town as my Mother had been watching over her with my brother and I visiting and helping when needed but my oldest sister got strep throat and my brother and I stepped in to help. Yesterday and last night was my turn.

    This was particularly tough on me because when I was younger I had breathing difficulties and then once as a young adult I pretty much drowned and had to be resuscitated. I'm phobic about not being able to breathe. I won't go swimming in water over my head.

    At 2:30 this morning I was actually typing a thread here saying how uncomfortable I was, all the time listing to the rattling in my mother's throat. The sound changed. I looked up and bubbles were coming out of her mouth. I ran to the door, yelled for the nurse who came in and suctioned. She ran to get some medicine (I think she said atropine).

    Guys, I haven't prayed in a LONG time. I haven't prayed because I had convinced myself that it doesn't do any good coming from me but very early this morning during the maybe 60 seconds that nurse was gone I did pray. I prayed for my mother's suffering to stop. I prayed for a merciful end.

    Less than five minutes later my Mother was gone.

    I have no idea if it was coincidence or or an answer to a prayer.

    The event did, however, leave me with images that I'm sure I'll see again in my nightmares. I watched her pass in the exact way I am most afraid of dying. I have never felt that horrified in my life. I am just thankful that she was sedated enough that she most likely didn't realize it was happening.

    We are all hurting, but we are also happy that her suffering has ended.

    I have to sleep now.
     
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2019
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  2. virginiashadow

    virginiashadow Legendary Woodsman

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    LC. I am very sorry to hear of your mothers passing. Rest up. Heal up. I got your back buddy.

    Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk
     
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  3. arrowflinger1

    arrowflinger1 Weekend Warrior

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    Sorry to hear Chief, my condolences to you and your family. Hang in there
     
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  4. The Old Man

    The Old Man Die Hard Bowhunter

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    Sorry for your loss Chief. I pray for comfort and peace for you and your family.
     
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  5. trial153

    trial153 Grizzled Veteran

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    Very sorry for your loss.
     
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  6. ash d

    ash d Die Hard Bowhunter

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  7. Okiebob

    Okiebob Die Hard Bowhunter

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    That's a tough one Chief, sorry for your loss.
     
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  8. Ridgerunner3

    Ridgerunner3 Die Hard Bowhunter

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  9. dnoodles

    dnoodles Grizzled Veteran

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    I hope you both find peace. Your mother in the hereafter and you here from your community on the forum and in the woods.
     
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  10. Sota

    Sota Legendary Woodsman

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    Sorry for your loss
     
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  11. Fix

    Fix Grizzled Veteran

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    Our prayers go out to you and your family.
     
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  12. blackbear

    blackbear Weekend Warrior

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  13. Frankiecruzer

    Frankiecruzer Weekend Warrior

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    Sorry for your loss


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
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  14. pastorbigdan

    pastorbigdan Weekend Warrior

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  15. elkguide

    elkguide Grizzled Veteran

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    So sorry for your loss. Prayers are real and do work. My prayers for you and your family.

    Life is so precious. Live every day to it's fullest.
     
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  16. Holt

    Holt Grizzled Veteran

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    So sorry about your loss LittleChief. That is rough thing to see and probably be with you for the rest of your life. But the only thing I can say is try and focus on the times that made you smile and laugh with your mother. We are always here for you!

    Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk
     
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  17. Westfinger

    Westfinger Die Hard Bowhunter

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    Sorry to hear of your mothers passing Chief.
     
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  18. CoveyMaster

    CoveyMaster Grizzled Veteran

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    Sorry for your loss my friend, some of the roughest times in life for sure. It's been almost a year since I had a similar experience with my dad.
     
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  19. Brandon backwoods

    Brandon backwoods Newb

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    Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. -Matthew 5:4


    Rebel
     
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  20. John T.

    John T. Weekend Warrior

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    My wife and I have gone through similar situations with our parents. Prayers are answered as your was. It is my prayer, as others indicated, that you will feel comfort in the days ahead. Brandon has posted a relevant Scripture verse. Thanks, Brandon.
    My wife and I went through a personal tragedy just after we were married. I found this to be comforting- https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm+121+&version=NIV
    After all these years, I find myself seeing or hearing something and thinking, "Mom/Dad would be interested in this."
     
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