Three old men were having coffee one morning. Talk drifted to their morning routine. One old timer spoke up. "Every morning, I empty my bladder at 6 AM. Then I have a bowel movement at 6:30 AM." One spoke up and asked, "So what's wrong with that?" "I don't get up until 7:00 AM."
Two men were out hunting when they came across a massive hole in the ground. “Wow,” said the first hunter. “That’s one deep hole - I can't even see the bottom!” The second replied, “Let’s toss something in and see how long it takes to hit.”They spotted an old car engine nearby, heaved it in, and waited...Suddenly, a goat came crashing out of the brush and dove headfirst into the hole! While they were still processing what they'd just seen, an old farmer wandered up. “Say, you boys haven’t seen my goat, have you?” One hunter said, “Well, weird you should ask… A goat just tore through here and jumped right into this hole! ”The farmer blinked and said, “Nah, can’t be. I had him chained to an old car engine.”
Eleven people were hanging from a rope under a helicopter — 10 men and 1 woman. The rope wasn’t strong enough to hold them all, so one person had to let go. After much debate, the woman gave a heartfelt speech: “As a woman, I’m used to giving everything for my husband, my kids, and you men in general. I’m always sacrificing and never getting anything back. So you know what, fellas? I’ll go. I’ll let go of the rope.” When she finished… all the men started clapping.
