I feel ya. Your wife need to realize you are both grown men that need the respect for the women they love. It's that simple and that difficult. You may also chat with the Dad about it. She feels she's just being helpful but you need to sit her down and tell her how it makes you feel.
Here are a couple of books I recommend everybody owns. They are based on biblical principles but not Christian books per say. They are so insightfull in to the way the opposite sex thinks and understands things differenty than you that it feels like insider trading Stuff I wish I knew when I was 18. Two books, one for you and one for her to read and if you read them together you'll find out every page has something on it that you didn't know about women and she didn't know about men. It's really wild. I liked them so much I bought two cases of these book sets and gave them out as gifts to all my friends and family for Christmas. http://www.christianbook.com/apps/product?item_no=5490;item_code=WW Single guys. You want to know how to get that girl to fall in love with. Read these. And when your done read the book about men and find out things about youself that you thought were unique to you but you find out every man thinks that way. They sale them on amazon as well.
I go to school at Pittsburg state so I live in Pittsburg most of the time. But my family is from Riverton which is the very, very SE corner of the state. About 2 miles from both the OK and MO line. I've not had much luck turkey hunting. I did get a big hen last year, but not that 7" bear that I'd hoped. To me it's harder than whitetail hunting for some reason. Probably because last year was my first season I guess.
Have you considered this... Maybe she loves you so much that she wants you to be as much a part of her biological family as she is. She grew up loving these people and love her unconditionally. Now she loves YOU, too. She might be trying, in a pushy sort of way, to try to make you a bigger part of that family. Girls, then women, 'feel' differently than men. Maybe she's trying to 'help' you all form a bond that's as close as hers is with them. Might turn out not to be a bad thing. Try talking to her about not pushing so hard, but agree to spend time with them. Could work out for all of you
I suppose most of us who are sons-in-law and father-in-laws have similar problems. Blessedly my wife and I have a relationship that allows me to tell her "no" and get away with it. Our marriage is going passed the 40 year mark. Being in the Army helped. We were never around our in-laws so we had to depend on one another. Now that we have settled down, my hunting issues are in the reverse. I ask my son-in-law and his dad for archery help. They are cool and never seem to think I am an idiot. That being said; "I don't like to borrow things honey because I will break it and have to pay for it anyway." "Honey it bothers me when you call your dad and ask questions that I should ask." You could always quote scripture but that usually doesn't work for me. "The husband and wife are of equal worth before God, since both are created in God's image. A husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. He has the God-given responsibility to provide for, to protect, and to lead his family. A wife is to submit herself graciously to the servant leadership of her husband even as the church willingly submits to the headship of Christ. She, being in the image of God as is her husband and thus equal to him, has the God-given responsibility to respect her husband and to serve as his helper in managing the household and nurturing the next generation" RC
I'd offer some suggestions, but I'd probably just make it worse for ya. LOL I do like what rk said though.
This is why my future wife will not be a diehard hunter, some hoppies/interest don't need to be shared with the spouse.
hmm being on my 4rth marriage I am not the best one to ask for advice but I will say if you don't end this now you are setting up a precedence for the rest of your relationship however long it may be. man up now in a polite way or it will creep into everything you try to do. just let her know you are a big boy and want to figure it out by yourself. if she cant respect that then you are most likely going to be in for a long relationship where she tries to control everything. not a nice way to live. but like I said I went through 4 marriages to find a good one
If your FIL is an experienced hunter, I would definitely ask his advice on some things if you have questions on them. Ultimately you should do things how YOU want to do them, your FIL and wife will end up respecting you more as a result. I would also call YOUR mother in front of your wife and ask her to "help" your wife improve at her short comings. If your wife doesn't like your mothers advice (and she will not) ask her why?
Hahaha ^ Being a from 11Bang Bang myself (army) and during my 8 years spent some time as a sniper i was already armed with knowledge on the subject of firearms and hunting when i married my wife (her father is big into firearms, and her brother big into hunting). So i feel i may be able to offer some advise On the things you know little about its good to take in advise(i welcome advise from my father in law that i know little about, mainly because i like the guy... maybe theres an issue there for you). The other thing is if you dont know much about something its best to arm yourself with Knowledge!! Go to your local (hunting) shops, ask questions there, "experience is the greatest teacher", and become an SME (subject matter expert) on what it is you are faced with. Once your wife sees you dropping knowledge on your father in law there might be some heat taken off of your shoulders from your wife. But remember you can read everything there is on hunting but until your apply it in the real world setting and gain some experience you're still a newb hahaha. Find some other hunting buddy's and learn from them. If the only person you are learning from and hunting with is your father in law you need to get more and find some other avenues. And when you do dont take your wife, thats man time, where you can fart, drink, dip, sleep, etc etc.
My wife didn't give me any grief about my FIL but a different way to look at this issue is the way I wish I would have looked at it My FIL got me into hunting and when I thought I was a "good enough" hunter I wanted to learn things by myself. This led me to a lot of hunting by myself and not so much with him. Now he is gone and I regret that I didn't spend more time with him even though I thought I had a better way to hunt or wanted to "learn" by myself. There is not a season that goes by that I don't remember his hunting tips or friendship.
This^^. I would worry less about doing it your own way, and compromise as much as you can. You might just find that you get a hunting partner for life out of the deal. I have hunted with my FIL many times, and even used his equipment, and I had a blast. Plus, when you hunt with someone, it gives you a chance to really talk to them, and I found out some cool stuff about my FIL.
Let me rephrase myself about my hunting experience. I have plenty of survival experience, knowledge and experience trapping small game and such. This is my first time hunting in the sense that I don't NEED to do this in order to survive a week in the mountains alone. I talk to my FIL all the time about things, especially hunting tips and tactics. He reccomended my new HS turkey calls, a few good WIHA sites, etc. I gladly accept his advice on things.
Hey, thought I'd give an update on what has happened since I started this thread. We had a talk, and she won't bother me about this issue anymore unless I ask her to first. I can now do what I want to, as long as i remember we are limited financially!
Good job Now agree that neither of you will spend over XX amount of dollars without at least consulting the other. You don't have to agree just talk about it. RC
With me, my zeal led to the divorce, it was not understood why I like to go hunting for animals to kill. For me, it is a passion that I do not want to give up. That's how I can understand you. I can not give you an advice, I made a decision then that I do not regret.
