Hey all, this will be my first year hunting, and I'm having an issue with my wife. She's from a big hunting family, and while I respect her father's knowledge of bowhunting, my wife wants me to do everything his way. My background is being a Marine Corps Infantryman, 0351 for the other jarheads out here. So of this, I'm a big fan of making range cards for my shooting position. These are basically a diagram of your shooting lane with landmarks ranged out for quick reference. My wife has a problem with this for some reason and says I'm an idiot and am making it obvious that I've never been hunting before. Now, she's talking to her father about us borrowing two of his rifles for deer season, completely ignoring my insistance I don't want to do that. I love my wife to death, but how do I tell her to just shut up and let me make my own mistakes without getting a migraine from the argument? Just wondering if anyone on here has had an issue like that with their spouse/significant other and how it was resolved. Thanks for your help.
Formally you need to express your feeling to your wife, I know its hard for a grunt to do so but how is your wife supposed to know how you feel unless you tell her. Also I know you want to "live and learn" but taking knowledge from someone that has done things b4 is never a bad thing man. Just like your asking us for assistance, you father-in-law the same, hes been there done that per-say.
I understand wanting to learn by making your own mistakes. It can be a very long process when it comes to hunting though. I grew up not having anyone to teach me how to hunt. It took me 7 years to kill my first deer. I'm sure you took advice from teachers in the Marine Corp why not in hunting? Sent from my GT-P3113 using Tapatalk 2
It's easier to strike a deal with a woman than it is to convince her of your way. Especially if it's coming from dear ol dad. Tell her to let it lie quietly, and if you don't harvest this season your way, you'll take your F-I-L's advice like it was straight out of your OIC's mouth. Extra benefit, keeps you motivated so you don't have to hear the "I told you so". In the end, if you do harvest you can be the better man and not say that in turn, and humbly accept the praise. Even if only from yourself for accomplishing something on you own. Sent from my SPH-M920 using Tapatalk 2
Her father has nothing to do with it. I completely respect his knowledge and have asked for his help plenty of times. Its my wife who won't shut up. He never offered to loan me a rifle, just said ok when she asked. I just invited her brother (who is also an archer) to come out with me on the first weekend in April. We've had issues like this when I want to go fishing too. I've told her i wanted to go alone, she just got all sad and mopey.
A wife who knows it all. Join the club brother! Here's what you do. Listen to her advise, and say "yes dear". Then do it how you want to. Afterwards you say "I should have listened to you dear, you were 100% right, as always" Usually works for me.
Always good take get as much advise as you can and be open minded and not at to full of yourself but in the end your wife should follow your lead and stop playing Daddy's little girl. That's great for her fathers world and his ego but it's not helpful to her husband sense of leadership and the new life she's started with you. My buddy has the same issue. His wives father can do know wrong and the Dad eats it up but mean time he's always the fall guy and looks like 2nd best. My Dad and sister play the same game. She strokes his ego and he babies her and thinks she's wonderful and their both asses.
My wife was a three time mid-Atlantic archery champion when she was younger(who was taught by her father) so I defiantly know the her way thing. But I was stubborn and didn't take her advice as to go hunting with my father in law. After about 2-3 years I finally said ok and brought him hunting with a buddy of mine on his property. Her dad has become probably my best hunting buddy and he's the one who got me into bowhunting from gun hunting. . Me and my wife did have those awkward moments where I wanted to buy something or was thinking about getting into something and she would just ask her dad if I could borrow it. Luckily her dad is really cool and told her that that is not how men do it. She took the hint then.
Is it about borrowing rifles? If that's the case just tell her you don't want to gun hunt only archery. If its about borrowing a rifle I find it hard to believe a man of the USMC don't have a rifle or two, so tell her I can use my own rifle don't need your dads
Pocketgunner: the rifles I have aren't exactly appropriate to hunt with. They're more "home defence" rifles if you get my meaning. Afflicted: I have no problems asking him for advice or tutelage in my form. It's her insistance I ask him, or worse her asking him "for me", that I have a problem with.
Been there my man. My now ex girlfriend was the exact same way. Her dad shot a compound but never used sights or a peep. When I met her I'd already been shooting for a couple years and was good. But for some reason she just assumed that I'd switch the way I was doing it to how her dad did it because she thought it was better. She said I was cheating and that he could out-shoot me open sights and a bunch of other crap that made me mad. Finally they both asked to watch me shoot one day and I could every dot on the target every time from whatever distance they wanted. She still nagged but I always harvested a deer and held my own at every 3d shoot so at least her old man appreciated my skill. Take this with a grain of salt because my relationship went sour, but never lay down for someone else and just let them tell you how you're going to do it. I do the same thing you do, I range distances in my lanes and I bet a lot of guys on here do, too. It's a good idea and makes the shot easier in the heat of the moment. Tell her how you want to do it and if she doesn't like it tell her she's more than welcome to do it her way on her own. It sounds like a ticket to the dog house, but if a woman can't accept small differences than I'll gladly use the doggy door to the backyard.
if i was you i would put my foot in my mouth and listen to her and listen to her dad and take it all into consideration and do whatever the hell ya want lol i would also listen to her dad and tell him the loaning of the rifles wasnt nessasary in a respectfull way
G-Street, thats good advice. Whereabouts in SEK are you? I'm in the Chanute area, and have been trying to find a good WIHA plot for turkey. Pearce92, thats probably what I'll end up doing, lol I really appreciate everyone's help with this, maybe someone else can use this thread for themselves!
Well you can always approach it to her like this, say I have no problem asking your dad for help or advice if I need it. Key word being if I need it. An I got ya on the home defense thing, but AR style rifles are becoming more an more popular for hunting. Particularly predator hunting or nuisance like hog. However something with a 10" barrel prolly won't do ya much good lol 14 or longer would be good Nikon and BSA make some nice 5.56 specific scopes. The BSA one comes with 3 turits calibrated for different grain weights
Yeah, but I'm not a coyote hunting fan, only major predator here. I've been out with friends, and other than for land management and fur, I don't see a reason to kill them. Only real nusiance species we have around here are cottontail and squirrel, both of which I can get with my Alpine.
