How do you handle grandparents that do not share the same beliefs as you?

Let's keep this simple for the moment and just discuss the issue of Christmas.

My family has never really celebrated Christmas. It was never a big deal in my house growing up. So, naturally, as an adult, I don't really care for Christmas. My wife, although growing up in a very Christmas house, does not go crazy about Christmas either. It is probably because she works in retail, and generally despises this time of year

Anyways, my MIL loves freaking Christmas and goes overboard with the gifts every year. Since we are about to have her first grandchild, she is already going nuts with the gifts, even before we know the sex of the kid. We have told her to stop, but she will not listen. How would you handle this? In the future, me, nor my wife want to make a big deal about Christmas gifts. Our child will probably never receive Christmas gifts from my parents.

 

Even if I did not like Christmas I would suck it up so my son could enjoy it. Christmas morning is magical for little kids.

 

All I will say is choose your battles. The majority of grandparents spoil grandkids, especially Christmas and birthdays. Let em, it's not worth having an issue over.

 

Yep

Yep

 

I'm with Buckeye on this one. My kids are rotten, but I love seeing them open gifts on Christmas.

We also use it as a time to teach the kids to give back. After they've made a list of things they'd like to receive, we set down and cross off a few of the gifts and each child (2) puts that gifts money toward a child in their class that is less fortunate. We don't do allowances, as you shouldn't get paid for things you are supposed to do, so this is their small attempt at putting others before us.

 

I'm all about being able to enjoy it, a few gifts are fine.

30 gifts are not.

 

^^^^ I totally agree. Its one thing to celebrate it and enjoy family and friends but entirely another to go way overboard. My family was the same way when I was growing up, we exchanged a few gifts but never got sidetracked with to many gifts as u lose the true meaning of Christmas when this happens..

 

So a 30 Pack of bud lite is out?

 

Absolutely. We get our kids a few things for Christmas, but don't go overboard. The grandparents get them a little something, but not a lot. Our family hasn't bought presents for each other for years. I don't even remember the last time Jill or myself gave each other a gift, Christmas or Birthday.

 

What are you the gift Nazi

 

Watch Bill Murray in "Scrooged" with half a buzz on, that should help.

 

I say it's the Grandparents right to spoil the crap out of their grandkids. Let them have their fun. It's not worth fighting over. I look forward to the day that I can spoil my grandkids.

 

It's called revenge. I stood up to the mil once, that was a bad move on my part.

If they want to buy them one gift or thirty who cares, I know the kid won't so why should you?

 

Agreed.

 

I agree with you here Hook! If they really want to spoil your kid, get a couple little gifts and one nice one. NO kids needs 30 gifts. Or better yet, get a few gifts and throw some $$ into a college fund.

 

I always just got one or two gifts from my grandparents and then my parents would encourage them to buy a savings bond or cash (which I never saw) for a college fund with the money they would have spent on the 30 gifts.

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because neither myself, nor my wife ever want Christmas to be a big deal in our household

 

Thats how my parents do it is a couple small ones then a nicer one as the "special present" and i wouldnt want money in a college fund then since its no fun. But i could really use it now

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If my parents do buy the kids gifts, they always ask us what we want them to get for the kids. Usually its something educational.

So, I would have no problem with the kids getting a bunch of educational gifts, but a mess of games and mindless electronics doesn't fly.

 

All I know is once your kid gets to that age where Christmas morning is the 'bees knees', you'll be more excited about buying nerf guns or Barbies than you ever have been in the past. Me and my wife have totally opposite childhood Christmas memories. Her parents barely did anything and mostly avoided the rest of her Christmas crazed relatives. Where in my family my parents weren't crazy but definitely hooked me up with some sweet TMNT gear. Like your situation though my grandparents were insane and spoiled all of us and our cousins. I remember leaving those parties with trashbags full of stuff! So with my past I like getting people gifts and try to get stuff I know they'd love and my wife just basically buys gifts so you can't say she didn't get you anything.