Fletch's 2019-2020 Semi Sarcastic BS Thread

You two better do a "Live from the Flo-Rid-A" thread if this meet up happens.

 

I'll be in Clearwater outside Tampa

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46 miles south of Clearwater Emerson Park reserve is one of my favorite places to go, we launch kayaks out of there but also wade fish, walk the trails etc, and it is free. If I was down there I would let you take the tandem kayaks for the day and use the rod and reels. My wife and daughter and her husband are headed down next Tuesday, they are fishing with a guide Wednesday.

 

I have. Dont rent a car and go driving around. I am very familiar with that resort and have been twice. The front desk has a list of fishing guides, wish I could remember the name of the one we used but part of his package deal included some super duper grass, I think I caught a fish or two. The wives came with, didn't say a word the whole time, best fishing outing I have ever had with women on the boat, I think. Beware the black ring worn on the right hand unless you are wearing one too and if that's the case have fun, plenty to choose from. Stay on the compound after dark. Repeat, stay on the compound after dark.

 

Black ring? I saw a mailbox with a pine apple on it in rural Georgia, I thought that meant something too?

 

That sounds fantastic. I might buy a pole down there for my son and I to fish. Give it away before we leave. Lol

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Black ring right hand. Swingers. Lol...just learned something new

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Unreal. Get to this little beach house and find a cold Bud in a tree.

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Nice

 

Beer trees are tricky to grow.

 

Pretty awesome pic on day 1. What are the chances I get all 3 kids in a pic with exactly 3 birds flying by at the same time? Good luck.

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I know it's an optical illiusion, but it looks like a CGI pterodactyl from the first Jurassic Park is dive bombing them.
My folks have a place just down the road in Englewood; I love that central gulf-coast part of Florida.

 

I have also been to that resort for a wedding. Me and my buddies and our significant others did a booze cruise- and were introduced by the boat captain to 'mamajuana' aka Dominican hooch moonshine. Holy hell. Like piney, grapefruity gasoline.

We got absolutely blitzed and were running off the end of the catamaran and jumping in (like an 8' drop) until my one buddy hit the end of the pontoon, slipped and did the splits landing with the point of the pontoon right in his taint. Full speed; full body weight right in the taint. He hit with a sickening thud, a yelp, then bounced and toppled over into the water. His wife and I ended up having to help him get back in the boat but he toughed it out the rest of the cruise.

Next day he was a complete mess. 3 days later he had to have a hematoma on his taint and thigh drained- by a Dominican doctor. Now that was a scary proposition.

Funny thing about that guy- he has had 3 Caribbean vacations all end in disaster. First was his honeymoon in Jamaica- a few days before 9/11/01. He got stuck for like an extra week.

Second was Aruba, Hurricane Felix in I think 08. Damage wasn't that bad but they had to evacuate and cut their vacay short. Last one was the Taint Drop in DR in 13.

Needless to say that guy has sworn off Caribbean vacations.

 

I've heard a lot about this mamajuana. Excited to try it.

 

The Taint Drop may be forever burned into a very dark corner of my mind. Curse you!!

 

I have an unopened bottle at home that we smuggled in our luggage once. We have yet to have enough courage to give it another go after a very forgotten night in DR.