Racewayking, I have been through this. There will be some BS to go through as Justin is right about bringing out the worst in people. First of all, who is the executor of the estate? If it is your wife, change the locks on the doors asap! Stop the ravaging as soon as possible. Then get a lawyer and follow the will. Don't expect a lot of help from other family members as you will most likely be disappointed from the sound of things. This is going to take over a year to settle. Mine took 3 years. Good luck. Sent from my Galaxy S3 and Tapatalk 2
My Wife is the executor and her sister lives in Texas. The locks are not a big issue, the place is packed floor to ceiling and most of the cash has been found in the house. The sister wants a few things in the house that are still buried and Dad's GF does two drive byes a day watching the place. The key for me is to honor his wishes, he and I talked about getting the Cabin back up to its former glory so it could be shared with family and friends. Poppa was a cool cat, the family came her at the tail end of WWII and they did a great job diversifying and saving their money. There is a reason he left her out of the will unless my wife preceeded him in death, I just can't get the wife to fully see it at this point.
I your assets are worth much, it's smarter to just gift them away to your kids slowly over a 5-10 year period BEFORE you die. My grandfather died with a family of 5 kids. His assetts surpassed the amount for heavy taxation since it was after the deadline for Obama to extend the estate tax cuts. So essentially, his kids lost 50% right off the bat. Then comes the issue of his newest will being from 1982. The estranged son being oldest then became executor of the will. It was a messy 2 year process that left the family divided and still not speaking. The best will is not even really needing a will and having it clearly defined for what little you have left. I never understood people going to the grave with every cent/property they have ever saved and then leaving headaches for their loved ones.
I like that and agree. Slowly give away your possessions so the greedy federal government cannot get it's grips on a persons hard earned money/property.
The last will and testament is a legal binding document. It is not your wifes or her sisters choice. What is written, no matter how wrong or right it may seem is the man's last wishes. We just went through it with my 94 year old aunt. Who knows why they do what they do. Her will divide(not a lot) among my brothers and I and my sisters family tree but cut out all the cousins on the other side of the family. We just can't figure it out... but we accepet it as there's not going to be much to argue about, a house, a piece of commercial property and that's it. She gave the commercial property to the guy that plows her driveway. She gave a bunch of cash to a friend, some to the chuch and all that. She went into a state of denial near the end. My brother and I put in cash to pay property taxes and things like that. We knew at the time they were donations not not to be recovered. Our concern was she left out the cousins on one side of the family tree. WE said maybe we can split and all that. There is no way to do that nicely. The will is the will and is a legal document. The administrator is in charge. Just do it.
We are looking at 500k or a little more in Properties, at least 700k in CD's and Retirement money, we still have her grandparents assets that her dad never had put into his name but the will spells out that she gets that. On top of that I have almost 80# of early 1900's Silver coins in the gun vault, 15k in cash we have found in the house so far, several guns with some being very collectable that I'm keeping per him and ton's of crap we will have to sell on e-bay. So far I have around six large plastic totes filled with watches and jewelry and we have only gone through two and a half rooms in the house. When it is all said there is quite a bit so after the fact I am fine with her giving her sister some money, I just don't want to eat all the taxes and watch her sister walk away with an effortless haul. In the end it is my wife's decision but I'm trying to keep her focused on the reality of what he wanted.
Wow. Interesting situation. My parents had eight kids and because they blew through their inheritance I guess, they decided to eliminate the family's of brothers that passed away before they did. So far its three brothers with 7 kids between them. I think it's lousy thing to do and I think there will be lot of hurt feelings at the reading of this will so I've told those that will listen that I think that we who gets something should put it all together and divide back into 8. Screw my Dads wishes in others words. It's your wife's now. She can do whatever she wants. Maybe right some wrong if that's in her thoughts.
Sounds like you have a deal like my mother-in law. Forturenately, the 3 children all got along and divided all the money and things she had hidden in the house. It was substantial. They also divided all the sterling and jewels etc. It made life simple. It took them a week to sort through clothes pockets, drawers and books to find it all. She and her husband had stuffed it in every nook and cranny.
That ^^. Wills and how they are probated and even the types of will recognized are state specific. What works in one state may not be valid in another. The thing that struck me about the situation was that you didn't mention the will was recorded. I would hire a lawyer who is knowledgable in your states probate procedures.
People do strange things. I'll give you two examples. My sister in laws father was a lawyer with the CIA. His wife died. He remarried shortly after. He died within 6 months. He did not have a will. His new wife had 4 adult children. Guess who ended up with the family goodies. Case two... a lawer in Houston. Tom's dad did almost the exact same thing. Tom was my replacement in Vietnam my first tour. His father was a lawyer who also happen to own a 2000 acre rice farm west of Houston. It's now a big subdivision. I hunted geese there in 19772=73. Toms Dad died without a will. Tom got his mothers wedding ring and that was about it.
First eliminate emotion, that is usually our first mistake, using emotion in our decision making. Think of it this way, if you die and leave a will that is because you want to speak for your self when you are no longer able to. If he had something drawn up, follow it to a T, he would have written it up differently if he wanted it to be different. If he wanted everyone to have certain things, or even have a say so, he would have put that in HIS will. I would hate to die and my family did their own thing against my final wishes so they could feel better. Not directing that last comment at you at all.
Went through this recently. Got real ugly real fast. Terrible ugly. Lots of good advice already mentioned. Again sorry for your loss
I agree for the most part with what has been said already. If I were in your shoes, I would hire a lawyer and present the will to the lawyer. Her dads will was what he wanted and should be respected.
