Damn straight. I'm entering my final year of grad school to become a licensed mental health counselor. I truly want to help people. I'm using all of my sh!tty life experiences (stroke, combat, witnessing/causing violent death, trauma, substance misuse, depression, anxiety, social anxiety, sucidal ideations/attempts, sexual abuse, and so on) with my gained knowledge and schooling to help people. Having so many adverse experiences allows me to get on a client's level (empathy) easier than someone who hasn't experienced as much and allows me to assist them quicker. Saying that someone out there has it worse than you makes a person who is suffering feel a thousand times worse and is one of the absolute worst things you can say to someone!!!! It is okay to be down, it is okay to be depressed, and it is OKAY to talk to a therapist about it. OND's response is a prime example of why someone should reach out to a trained therapist as opposed to a friend or acquaintance. Someone who is suffering needs to be heard unconditionally and not be "fixed" or, "told" how to feel. They just need to be heard and let those thoughts and feelings be explored and validated. Our society has evolved from the hunter-gatherer days when a man needed to be tough as nails and had no time to cry because he needs to kill a deer for dinner or his family would die. I'm not saying grow a man bun and wear skinny jeans like Justin, but the ideology of a man needing to be tough and strong is long gone for most of our modern society. We have evolved as a human race and are far removed from that schema. Does someone else out there have it rougher? Yes, I'm sure they do. However, what you are experiencing/feeling is real, and you are worth the time to talk about it. Everyone experiences things differently. It does not make someone less of a man because the way they have experienced something affects them differently than someone else. People need to STOP with that sh!t!!
What one calls jaded another calls realistic. When reality proves to have skipped a few,than one can "celebrate". Though when one realizes some things in life are what they are, there's no need to be disappointed and or blind sided around every turn. BTW....Being told that there are others having it far worse then me and to look to and count my blessings is why I am still on this earth. It is actually also why another person is on this earth as well. I went to a therapist when I realized I could end a person. The only thing that stopped me was realizing they were not worth it and I was worth more. That therapists went to my abuser and told them everything we discussed. So there's that.
That sucks that you experienced an abusive relationship, I'm truly glad you were able to survive it. I'm not sure what the laws are/were in NY, but there is a good chance it is a duty to inform/protect law where if you disclose that you are going to hurt yourself or someone else, then the counselor by law, has to inform/or make an attempt to protect that person even if they deserve a bullet in the head. Limits of confidentiality are one of the first things I go over with a client and make sure they understand and have them repeat it back to me.
I actually never disclosed either, it was everything else we discussed they told them. Now I am a self aware person so no need to go over something I knew when I went in was an issue . This stranger wasn't going to be able to undo what this person had done nor what I nearly did. A cup of hot tea in the face for saying I was not going to engage in an argument was a tipping point. I knew when a complete calm came over me as I slowly got up from reading my book approaching her calmly explaineing there was no one around to help her . A slow low voice as I told her she had finally done it. I backed her into the gas kitchen stove and with one hand lifted her on to the burners. I told her she had one and only one chance to shut her mouth the next word and I would light said burns with my free had. The whole time I was thinking God what a waste of space, her first husband tried shooting her. I told her she was done, done black mailing me with lies, setting me up to be raped yes one of her employees..did he ever have an unpleasant surprise. Done beating her daughter's. That she now knew how rapidly I could end her. I then told her I was letting her go but she'd never make it out the door if I heard a single word. No gun , knives, beatings. Just a 16 yr old verbally and mentally abused by a sick nasty piece of work for 4yrs having an awakening. I eventually moved out while going to high school in honours, working 3 jobs and then going to college. I actually should have thanked her. The therapist well 3 yrs later license revoked on ethics grounds. Life sometimes doles out it's own justice just slowly. Funny she sent her therapist to me years later, to save her life. Therapist asked me,me to go to police and tell them the danger she was in. The woman was lucky for the sheriff did not listen, her lover was cut in two right in front of her but he spared her...lol She was a human wrecking ball walking through life trying to destroy the lives around her. She was rather accomplished at this ,save mine. She flipped a switch in me that day. Clarity and perspective sometime it may sound cynical though it's not. I did not survive my upbringing....I embraced it and still do. Lessons learned as it were. Here's one thing it gave me...today I went out of my way to make strangers laugh. This is done every time I go any where. I believe I was up to 6 before a man walked by me then called my name..someone I did not recognize and had not seen in years. He then his wife chatted with me for 40 mins even though I was actually in a hurry. They both walked away with big smiles on their faces. So what supper was at 7, they and I enjoyed catching up. So that's what life taught me. When I leave it,I'll leave knowing if only for a moment I've made hundreds of people I'll never actually know lol, if only for a moment in their day. You would be amazed at how many thank me and a little creepy, also remember the encounter years later. So no not survival at all to me an awakening.
I will say being married to someone who is bipolar-1 and myself having anxiety issues the right meds can be a Godsend. Not every drug is bad. I was a pharma nay sayer and still am but alot of the drugs that have been around and stood the test of time are around for a reason. I know me, my wife, and our marriage is alot healthier when we are both healthily medicated lol.
Myself, I have anxiety and it went beyond my waking hours, I have destroyed my molars grinding my teeth in my sleep, replaced them but still grind thru mouth guards. IBS when I am awake. I finally decided to talk to my Dr when my wife said I was a miserable SOB and it effects other people. I always loved fire because when I was in charge of a fire it was chaos, but that was manageable thru tactics vs what went thru my head when I slept. It is a grind a spinning in your head that never goes away, never goes away. Imagine having everything you ever wanted and you can't enjoy it.
as someone who had a sibling almost killed by and is personally involved in multiple lawsuits and EEO proceedings against [email protected]/INC; respectfully Justin- you have no idea what you're talking about. The 'good doctor' is the exception, not the rule. Any provider which doesn't have a majority self pay business model is automatically under The Thumb. And many of those, if not most, are perfectly content to be there.
Ive ground mine down too brother. I run wide open and apparently dream the same when sleeping. I need to get one worked on asap.
It's a simple business model. I had one Dr try to put me on anxiety med because I had a debilitating back pain it was all I my head...no it was actually a lot all in my back and a fall of all things 3 yrs later actually corrected it. Now he refused to do the medical scans that may have found what was actually going on. I did a bit of investigation on this Dr.. then quit him. Gee want to guess who went on to get a very, very cushy job with Blue Cross And Blue Shield ..See he routinely refused medical scans and other expensive procedures. It was also usually woman that had pain that was depression not actual pain....a pill pusher Told a female Doc for 3yrs. I was very uncomfortable it felt like I literally had a babies head moving around in me. Physical exams showed nothing, all in my head. She left to care for her parents. New Dr had a PA look me over and I told her. She ordered a scan. I had a tumor the size of a grapefruit in me, so not in my head. I could go on for days seeing I also have family in the medical profession and in laws that are the head of Pharm. companies.
There are more than 1 million licensed physicians in the United States. Using interactions with a handful of bad ones as the basis of an argument to say they're all bad simply doesn't work for me. Between my myself, my wife, my kids, and other immediate family members, I've had interactions with dozens of them through the years. I can't think of a single interaction that I would say was horrible or that I felt was being driven by big pharma. I've had some that seemed to care more than others, some that were quicker to jump to medication than others, some with better bedside manners than others, but none of them left me feeling like the decisions they made were driven by profit, greed or at the behest of some corporate puppet master. People are much more inclined to speak out about problems than good experiences. Yes, there are good and bad doctors - no different than good and bad lawyers, plumbers, and all professions. Maybe I'm wrong, but I'd rather be an optimist than a pessimist. Oh, and I clench my teeth horribly at night. Finally got fitted for a mouth guard at the dentist last week, so I feel your pain, fellas.
Interesting reading. I'll just say, check in on your buddies, family included. I've had 3 friends younger than me, 45, pass in the last month. One suicide and still haven't heard the cause of the others. I have vet buddies I call frequently for obvious reasons. Personally, I have found that just talking to those close to me is better than therapy and I'm also on anti-anxiety, anti-depressant (a recent thing for me). I was under siege and had to do something. It has helped and I have no shame about it. Losing one of my best friends a couple years ago started the landslide and some on here have heard some of the story. I still have days over that one and it's hard to even type that out. Pretty simple part of humanity is helping others around us and letting people help us.
Covid has ripped the veil off Modern Medicine.gov/INC. I am not saying there are not decent individuals practicing medicine, but unless on a self-pay model they are so regulated and influenced by both the government and insurance companies (which due to the ACA are one and the same,) and also Big Pharma (which due to campaign contributions, kickbacks, stock options, overt quid pro quo and the circular hiring between government appointees and Big Pharma companies are now also one and the same) You cannot look at these entities separately anymore. The insurance companies, government, and providers who take their money are all completely interconnected. The providers who would otherwise 'do no harm' on a personal level are pretty much forced to do whatever the insurance companies permit under threat of non-payment and/or what the G tells them to do under threat of medicare/medicaid reimbursement, censure, or even loss of license. If you had only heard how many times the past 12 months I have heard 'insurance won't authorize....', 'I would, but the hospital won't allow...', or 'my hands are tied', or 'I'm following the guidance', or 'I'll be fired/lose my license...' Both on a family and professional level, I have and am currently fighting several legal battles across multiple providers and throughout several health care systems. It has now been proven there is no link to serotonin levels and depression. SSRIs are not particularly effective in treating mental health issues; and also the side effects can be debilitating (and likely deadly when mixed with alcohol and probably marijuana.) https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/ar...ssants-harmful-effects-decades-no-reason.html https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC181155/ My final words here- mental help is a phone call away. Just don't jump at the first easy fix in a pill that someone tries to hand you. Their guidance is not always altruistic or unencumbered by profiteering; and is always under the influence of government coercion. Always ask yourself - Cui bono?
@dnoodles I saw that this morning about the SSRI's. I'm on an NDRI and wondered if there is anything new out there about that type. I also watched a segment on how the medical research on Alzheimers is basically a fraud for over a decade, funded in the billions by taxpayers, NIH, and peoples own contributions. Billions. Special place in hell for those greedy a holes.
Honestly not familiar with NDRIs. I only know about the SSRI stuff b/c of chatter amongst my fellow plaintiffs on a C19 related suit.
Just talked to a family member this morning ....retired teacher 4 shots and in excellent shape active a few years older and,way skinnier than me. 12 days in to Covid and she was coughing up a lung on the phone,sicker than sick. Husband the sniffles and 8 days in. Within the next 5 years they won't be able to keep up with the deaths. IMO
" Saying that someone out there has it worse than you makes a person who is suffering feel a thousand times worse and is one of the absolute worst things you can say to someone!!!! " Bullshit !! Sometimes it is what they need to hear. Not saying for everyone but in this day and age of me, me , me... I swear a lot people run for a train wreck just so they can get sympathy. They make bad choices only to do it over and over again with the same results. I work long hours and the job can be stressful to say the least. There are days I would love to say f it and quit but that doesn't pay the bills. This year has been one of the worst with everything going on with work and life in general. The two things that have keep me going are " someone else has it worse " and " pull up your bootstraps ". Keep fighting the good fight. You take the good with the bad. You focus on the good. You work harder to make the bad better by not making bad choices or letting it drag you down. When you are done with work, you don't bring that stress home with you so you can focus on your family. Don't drag them down by being stressed out. The only one that is going to make you happy is you in how you handle things and the choices you make. Take responsibility for yourself. That seems to be really lacking these day for a lot of people from what I am seeing.
Just thinking over the last couple of years of some of the mental health related calls Ive been to. People waking up in the middle of the night, looking at their family in the same room before blowing their brains out. Naked dude took a knife and plunged it through his neck and out of the other. More blood on the ground than I care to remember as we packed his wounds. Those are just a couple. I will tell you a funny story and God bless this woman bc I think she is ok now. We get a call about some elderly lady walking around an apartment complex with a knife. We get there and all the tougher guys in the neighborhood start telling us, "yo man some crazy old white lady up in there with a knife!". So at that point I knew this is gonna get weird. She had backed herself up into a laundry room by a steel covered window. I get all the proper equipment to handle the situation and as I am reassuring the officers that she is an old woman and there is no way she can move quickly, this lady jumps up and starts stabbing the steel covered window like a 20 year old! We were all like hey lady calm down please! She then advances with the knife toward us and we deployed the taser. She falls to her back and I removed the knife...she then says, "reach into my belly button, youve won 1 million dollars!". hahaha. Poor lady had gotten a blood infection and wandered miles from home.
I used to work in a Jail and one of the Sgts always said when he retired, he would write a book of all the crazy things he has seen and heard. His favorite was 1 guy who sat in his cell and was fishing. He went back a few hours later and he was then scaling the fish he caught. He invited the Sgt to have a fish supper later but he declined. VS I can only imagine what you have seen being a police officer.
I want to Like and Dislike your post at the same time. Drinkin' Bros podcast used to do a thing where they would have LEO and First Responders call in with some of their craziest stories. Many, it's a crazy world out there!
