We already told the kids, your on your own why? Because we are close to retirement and they have been with their significant other for 18 years for daughter and 10 for the son . What would be the point of a wedding now? We paid for our own wedding. The day 180 invitations arrived I turned to hubby and said sorry no. I said I rarely even see these people and half are your parents friends we don't really know . I said parents, siblings and grandparents . He said do I have to wear a tux , no. We went to a great local steak house told everyone to order what ever they wanted. The restaurant gave us their up stairs with our own bartender. It was a great time. We never heard anyone later complain about the menue, music open or closed bar, the dinner wine. All these usual things people comment on. No one went into debt. His parents spent 30 + thousand dollars on first daughters wedding and it lasted 2 years they then paid 50 + on the second daughters. What a waste of money in the name of appearances. We spent money helping the kids buy their homes, something that lasts more than one day.
We may stick to the traditional (grooms parents cover rehearsal dinner, brides parents pretty much everything else) if he asks. They're both college grads and working so they may cover a lot of the costs themselves. The other thing, in the South (as opposed to the northeast where I grew up) it seems that it's very acceptable to have a very modest reception (I.e no sit down meal) . Which keeps costs lower.
Back home (KS) "Supper Clubs" were a loophole back in the day for drinking laws. You had to be a member to enter and due to being a "private" club they could serve alcohol outside of normal legal drinking hours, like Sundays and between the hours of 2AM-10AM. They were popular with 3rd shifters who wanted to hit a bar after work. When the states drinking laws relaxed many years ago the Supper Clubs all faded into nonexistence.
I hadn't been to a supper club since I was a kid when my parents took us to one. It was in Northern Wi, Vilas county. When we bought our bar 4 years ago, we found out there was a supper club real close by. It is located out in the sticks about 2 miles away. Kind of a hard to find place. The wife and I have been there a couple of times. The food was good. The atmosphere was great!
Woke at 5 am today, which by itself for me belongs in the rant thread, and couldn't get back to sleep. So I'm up and making coffee when my 9 yo daughter comes in the kitchen and I'm like "you should probably go get some more sleep". She stayed up with me despite my minor protest and we are watching various hunting shows like Meateater, Drury and BHOD while I "work". She's interested, asking questions and I'm answering. She loves the elk hunts and so do I. If I ever get to do an elk hunt, I can only hope maybe she would want to go with me. Or heck just go on any hunt with me. My other two daughters never showed any real interest. Anyway, I'm loving this and it has been a cool start to the day.
We had 350 guests at my wedding so that much food, open bar for a couple of hours, venue, DJ, photographer, dress/tux - everything - total wedding cost was about 6 grand. Glad I live where I do apparently.
What is wrong with kids getting married today? My wife and I did our wedding for under $2000. We spent near 8K on the honeymoon and paid for all it ourselves.
What we told our daughters is we will give you fixed amt when you get married. How you use it is up to you. Our oldest daughter had a modest buffet snack reception at the church, despite inviting maybe 200ppl. She and her now husband 2 yrs later have bought a car, house and paid her school loans. With baby delivery days away. When I got married, I took a second job, paid cash for rings, pastor, and honeymoon. Wife got a dress on sale, costs were snacks, cake and photographer.
Daughter had the sit down dinner followed by dancing and partying then at 10:30 pizzas were delivered, I was like wtf I just bought them all dinner 4 hours ago and now they need pizza?
M My wife and I did something similar after the honeymoon. It took us six years to pay off student loans but we did it before buying a home. I have all boys so I never have worry about paying for a wedding again unless the woman they marry is an orphan. My boys can pay for whatever her parents don’t cover.
I have 3 daughters. I told all of them that I insisted they take hunter's safety, if just for some extra training besides mine for gun safety, but the choice to hunt is their own. The first wanted to turkey and deer hunt, still deer hunts to this day but not so much turkey. Middle wanted to turkey, deer, and elk hunt. Now married to a Marine stationed in Hawaii, so she hasn't done any hunting for a couple of years. The youngest had no interest in hunting anything. I bought the first two their own rifle for H.S. graduation. Knowing the youngest didn't want to hunt, I asked her if she'd rather have something else. Out of the blue, with never a word or sign she had any prior interest, she asked for a bow to start doing 3d shoots with me. You should've seen my smile. Anyway, start her slow. Even if she likes to watch the elk hunts, perhaps offer her to do some bird hunting with you, turkey or upland game. My girls have all said that while it's tough to shoot a "pretty deer", they have no issue shooting a bird. And don't be stupid like I was and forget that they are younger and not as gung ho on hunting. Taking them the first few times without lots of snacks, drinks other than water, or plans to take a few breaks during the day goes a long ways. Bringing a .22 or something along to do some shooting after the hunt goes over well too. Good luck on gaining a lifelong hunting partner!
Absolutely on the snacks and drinks! She is constant motion so I need to take some bungee cords too...joking. I can imagine you wore that smile for weeks when yours asked for that bow. Good times and thanks for the advice.
