Funny Bow Hunting Stories

Hey guys, I'm collecting funny Bow Hunting related stories for a chapter in a possible publication. These stories can be true stories or not, just as long as they are funny.

Please post them on this forum thread so we can all enjoy them and if they are used, I will contact the poster/author about publishing.

Thanks guys, I've been around enough camp fires to know y'all have some really good ones.

BlondeGuy

 

Bumb! I can not say I have any really funny stories but I have some wierd stories.
This is a long read, but I promise you it's a great story!!

Last year on Halloween, my buddy and I decided to head out for an afternoon hunt. It was a full moon and we didn't think we would see anything but since it was Halloween, and we saw a buck the Halloween before(the piece we were hunting didn't treat us very well, I think in 2 years we saw 10 deer lol), we decided we should give it a try. We headed out around 12 noon and got there around 12 30. We walked in and gave eachother the "shake and bake" good luck fist bump and split our separate ways. The piece we were hunting was pretty small so our stands were roughly 300 yards apart. I crossed over the tree line into the woods and walked the 30 yards to my stand. I remember making a lot of noise with crunchy leaves and twigs on the ground and I remember thinking "I just woke the neighborhood." I got to my stand latched my bow to the hoist, said my quick pre-hunt prayer consisting of giving thanks for being able to hunt, to watch over us, and to beg for a buck, then I headed up the ladder. Got up, strapped in, put my pack on the hanger, and pulled my bow up. About half way up, I heard something off to my left. I stopped pulling my bow, and gave it the slow head turn and noticed a 6 point just laying down, rubbing his antlers on some low hanging branches about 20 yards away. I was shocked to see that with all the noise I made, he was still just laying there and had no idea I was there. I turned back and continued pulling my bow up. I got my bow and nocked an arrow. He was still laying there. I studied his rack more closely to realize that he was the same buck we saw the Halloween before and that I had passed up on a 15 yard shot because he wasn't big enough. I made the decision that I would shoot if I had a shot. 20 minutes pass, and he's still laying there playing with his rack..lol. I texted my buddy to tell him what I see. My stand was very noisy and creaky and we had a gust of wind that made my stand let out a really loud creak. He stopped, looked directly at me and I made the mistake of getting into a stare down with him for what seemed like 5 minutes but it was probably only 45 seconds. He broke eye contact and brushed it off. 20 minutes later he stood up and started walking away from me. I grunted once and he turned and walked back. He got within 20 yards but I never had a shot, he seemed to know all my shooting lanes. He continued walking past and behind a small mound about 30 yards from me. The mound blocked my view of him. I never saw him walk out the other side so I knew he was either still back there or he walked out of the woods back there where I couldn't see. An hour passes and I see his antlers move a little bit. He was bedded down behind the mound. I grunted to try to get him to stand and walk out from behind the mound but he didn't flinch. He was down wind from me so I sprayed a little buck bomb buck urine since I was hunting a scrape. He never flinched. Another hour passed, and I was in awe of this bucks ignorance so I started to play with him and test him. I was hungry so I took out an apple and started eating, no response. I crunched my apple and smacked my lips, chewed with my mouth open and still no freaking response. I finished my apple and was feeling frisky so I threw my apple core at him. I hit a few feet from him and still no response. By this time I was getting close to my last hour and a half of shooting time and I knew I had to do something drastic. I texted my buddy and jokingly said I could probably climb down and walk over there and shoot him. My buddy tripple dog dared me so I knew I had to do it. I tied the bow up, let it down, climbed down the stand very slowly and quietly. I got to the ground and listened for movement since he was now out of sight since I was at ground level. I didn't hear anything. I grabbed my bow, and slowly started walking that way. The leaves were so crunchy! I walked so slow I saw a slug cut me off and give me the bird. Anyway, 45 minutes later I had ninja walked 20 yards and was now on one side of the mound and he was on the other(assuming he was still there). I kept moving slowly. I got within 5 yards and could see his rack moving around on the ground. I took one more step and stepped on a tree branch coverd by leaves. He stood up and started walking my way. He didn't notice me. He walked behind a small tree and I started to draw but it was so small I didn't get there and let down. His head came out the other side of the tree and he turned at me. At this point I was shaking so bad and my heart was racing so fast! He looked me in the eye while he was 4 yards from me. He slowly walked closer and I kid you not, he got close enough that I could have reached out and grabbed his rack. He finally heard my heat racing or something and he perked up and got really antsy. He took a step back and turned. I drew my bow as fast as I could hoping to get a shot. No luck, he took off running. I knew at this point my hunt was over but I had this great idea to try to run after him and an angle that would make him turn towards the direction my friends stand was. My plan worked, he was now running towards my friends stand that is about 300 yards. I texted my friend really quick and said "get ready now!" 30 seconds later I get a phone call from my friend. He very quietly, excitedly yet at the same time said " I got him." I met him out in the field. We made a few calls and headed in to track before we didn't have any light. We got to the sight of the shot and got the glowing arrow thanks to the lumenok! We quickly picked up some blood. We followed it, until we saw a red carpet of blood. I'm not kidding, this was the best blood trail I have ever seen or heard of, it was a hunters dream! We tracked him to the edge of the tree line and the blood ended at a steep drop off going down to the river. We scanned for more blood, and didn't see any. I looked around and saw a rack sticking out of the river. I, being a very tactical and adventurous minded person decided I wanted to go swimming after him. I got in the freezing river with all my clothes on and got to him. I grabbed his rack and waded to the bank with him in hand.We pulled him up a onto a little rocky area down by the river and took some pictures before we ran out of light. We then began draggin the deer only to notice that the only way out was back up the very steep drop off we went down. We finally got him up after a lot of hard work and got him to the truck. We took him to the road where we field dressed him. We packed him up and headed home. The next day my buddy took him to the processor and the next week he was putting meat in the freezer! That ended up to be the most memorable and funny hunts I have ever been on even though I wasn't the one putting meat in the freezer.

 

What do you mean you didn't put any meat in the freezer??? You're buddy didn't share after you "called it into him" Jeez- get a new hunting buddy. Calling one into me would at least get you a backstrap, shoulder roast and a ham.

 

well, i have a shorter story. i was hunting with my dad and one of hir friends and they had rifles and i had my bow. we were situated about 100 yards apart each. about an hour into the hunt, i hear my dads friend lighting up the woods with his 30-06 about 30 seconds later after i had come back down onto the seat of my stand (thats how high i jumped), i heard a funny noise. A crab claw 4 point was limping through the woods toward me. the buck stopped about 15 yards from my stand and i slid a rage behind his shoulder. This knocked all the fight out of him and he expired about 3 steps later. what had happenned was the bullet from my dad's friend's gun had grazed his shoulder and he had decided to head in my direction. it was a great thing to laugh about when we got back to the house.

 

A few years ago, my cousin had just shot a doe and was having trouble finding her. He called me, one of his brothers, and his dad to come help track her. We followed the minimal blood trail for 2 hours, all over the woods. Finally, we walked over the top of the hill and there she was, lying on her side. My uncle walked up to her, and for some reason, did not check to make sure she had expired, and stepped across her. No more than his foot hit the ground, she stood up and and starts bucking like its a rodeo Unable to get off, and in an attempt to not fall, he wraps his arms around her neck and they both fall over. He is hanging on and she is kicking and twisting trying to get free. The rest of us are in awe at this point of what we are seeing. After a few seconds, she gets free and runs about 40 yards and falls over- this time for good. We still laugh about that day every once in a while...it's one of those times I wish I would've had a video camera. I still can't believe my uncle didn't get hurt.

 

One day, during peak rut, I was getting set up in my stand as my dad was making a mock scrape and putting some buck urine in it. Once I was all set in my stand, he headed towards his ground blind (about 50 yards behind me). Roughly 5 minutes later I heard a lot of rustling over towards the direction of his blind. After a little bit I kinda got worried about what was going on and shot him a text to see what was up. Moments later I got a reply that said "I spilled pee everywhere." I just about died laughing in my stand. Turns out the cap was screwed down all the way and spilled all over everything in his pack and all over his hands. The rustling was him trying to wipe his stuff down with the leaves. It was a funny day-for me of course

 

I posted this a while back but still get a laugh out of it when I think about it.



I was sitting in my tree stand the other night when a coyote came snooping around. He was a complete surprise to me but that in itself is no surprise. Anyway, I got ready and drew back when he was behind a bush and waited for him to step out. He did and I let fly. Well I MISSED! A 10 yard shot. It flew right past his nose. I could see the lighted nock go within inches of his nose and stick in the dirt in front if him. I was shocked as he dropped like a rock. He fell and looked as dead as a stump right where he was when I shot. I couldn't believe he had been hit. I pulled up my binocs to see if I could see blood even though he's was only 10 yards away. He looked dead,,,,,,,,for about 20 seconds. Then he started to quiver, then roll over, and finally stand up. He stumbled for a short time and finally started crawling off into the brush. The last I saw of him was about 50 yards off and running full blast through the woods. I truly think my shot scared the crap out of him and he fainted. Craziest thing I ever saw. I was so stunned I didn't even think to shoot again. Oh well, better luck next time.